Written by Prisha Tiwari
What Are Abandonment Issues And Its Impacts?
What are abandonment issues? Abandonment issues are when someone has strong fear of losing someone they care about or of someone leaving a relationship.
People with abandonment issues usually worry that friends or partners will leave them, look for signs that others don’t really like them, need recurring reassurance that others people like them, are people pleasers, have a lack of boundaries, put too much in relationships, and/or stay in toxic relationships due to a fear of being alone.
People with abandonment have high levels of anxiety, especially if a relationship is starting to come to an end. This can result in them coming off as “clingy”, or start to read too deep into things and see problems that don’t exist. Also, the person can have poor communication strategies in order to ease their fears. They may partake in abusive techniques to prevent someone from leaving by manipulating them or trying to stop them from talking to others.
What Causes Abandonment Issues?
There isn’t one specific cause to why people have abandonment issues. It can be a combination of things or a specific thing, but there are some examples.
Abandonment issues can stem from childhood, the person might have been neglected or abused by their parents or guardian. Or family instability can be another reason, caregivers who aren’t always present or affectionate can cause someone to have abandonment issues. Traumatic events are a factor too.
If someone starts to feel their mental health being negatively affected by their abandonment issues they should talk to a therapist or psychologist.
If you know someone with abandonment issues you can help them by encouraging them to get help. You should talk to them without criticizing them and express that you care for them and are concerned. Be kind and calm, and offer a lot of reassurance, focus on how their issues are affecting their well being. Don’t threaten to leave if they don’t get help, or blame them and make them change without being supportive.
If you have abandonment issues you should try to find hobbies or something you love doing to give yourself confidence outside of the relationships you have with people. Make an effort to notice your reproving thoughts and meet them with compassion. Practicing general self care like eating right and exercising may make you feel better.